Have you at any point left a conversation feeling like what the hell just happened? For instance, for one brief moment, you are pretty certain you were making “good sense” in the conversation you just had. And the next moment, you are uncertain of what you said and even wonder if anything that was said in the conversation was real to start with. In fact, you are so bothered by the conversation that you start to wonder if the whole conversation really happened. So, then, in the next moment, you begin to replay the whole conversation over and over in your mind, trying to discover what was real. Fast forward and welcome to the world of the Narcissist. Where you will encounter deceit, manipulation, and even have your own words used as weapons against you. A world where even truth is a moving target.
Narcissists are masters of disguise. They often hide their true intentions behind a mask of charm, charisma, and confidence. When you first meet them, you think you’ve met your “soulmate.” But, as time goes on, and it will, their mask slips, especially during an argument, and the manipulative tactics they use can be shocking, even terrifying. You won’t believe it. You wonder where the monster came from.
Recognizing the tactics used by the narcissist is essential not just for your emotional well-being but also for reclaiming your sense of reality. In this article, we’ll explain the 14 common phrases narcissists use during arguments, what they really mean, and how they’re designed to twist the truth, shift blame, and keep you doubting, what’s real and what’s the narcissist game plan.
List of Narcissistic Phrases and Their Meaning:
1. Gaslighting a. Example: “I never said that. You should recollect it wrong.” b. What It Truly Means: The egotist is attempting to make you question your memory, your view of the real world, and eventually, your mental stability. By denying what they’ve said or done, they plant seeds of uncertainty, making you more dependent on their rendition of occasions.
2. Blame-shifting
a. Example: “This is your shortcoming. In the event that you hadn’t done that, I could never have responded along these lines.”
b. What It Truly Means: The egotist won’t get a sense of ownership with their activities. All things considered, they bend what is happening to cause you to feel remorseful for their terrible way of behaving, successfully transforming themselves into the person in question. 3. Projecting
a. Example: “You’re continuously attempting to control me. You’re the person who’s controlling.”
b. What It Truly Means: The egotist is avoiding consideration from their own controlling conduct by blaming you for doing precisely exact thing they’re at legitimate fault for. It’s an exemplary instance of someone acting over hypocritically, intended to befuddle and incapacitate you.
4. Invalidation
a. Example: “You’re overcompensating. It’s anything but no joking matter.” b. What It Truly Means: The egotist excuses your sentiments as unreasonable or misrepresented, making you question the authenticity of your feelings. By limiting your interests, they affirm command over the profound story.
5. Deflecting
Example: “We should not discuss me. You’re the person who necessities to chip away at yourself.”
What It Truly Means: The egomaniac abstains from tending to their conduct by moving the concentration onto your imperfections, genuine or envisioned. It’s a redirection strategy intended to guide the discussion away from their inadequacies.
6. Manipulative flattery
Example: “You’re the only one I can depend on. I don’t what I’d do without you.” What It Truly Means: The egomaniac utilizes praises and statements of reliance to cause you to feel extraordinary and indispensable, however just for the purpose of holding you under their influence. There’s no need to focus on adoration or appreciation; it’s about power.
7. Minimizing the issue
1. Example: “Why are you making such a big deal out of this? It’s not that important.”
2. What It Really Means: The narcissist downplays the severity of the issue to dismiss your concerns and keep you from addressing their behavior. It’s there way of brushing aside any challenge to their authority or sense of superiority.
8. Threats and intimidation
Example: “Assuming you leave me, you’ll think twice about it. I have approaches to making your life hopeless.”
What It Truly Means: The egomaniac utilizes dread to keep you caught in the relationship. By undermining you, they intend to impart uncertainty and dread, guaranteeing that you stay where they have some control over you.
9. Triangulation
Example: “This “person and that “person” believe I’m correct. You ought to pay attention to them.”
What It Truly Means: The egotist carries an outsider into the contention, whether genuine or fanciful, to approve their situation and sabotage your certainty. It’s a strategy intended to segregate you and make you question your judgment.
10. Defensive Victimhood
Example: “You’re continuously going after me. Per you, I never do any right.” What It Truly Means: The narcissist plays the victim to take the focus of the way they are behaving, causing you to feel guilty for supporting yourself. The whole point of this is to make you feel guilty instead.
11. Using your information against you
Example: “Remember when you told me your secret?” Perhaps I ought to tell everybody your secret.”
What It Truly Means: The egotist weaponizes your weaknesses to silence and control you. A profoundly manipulative strategy goes after your trust and fears.
12. Outright lying
Example: “I didn’t do that. That is no joke.” What It Truly Means: The narcissist lies without a second thought, making an other reality where they’re generally guiltless. It’s a type of gaslighting that leaves you doubting your own memory and insights.
13. Faking ignorance
Example: “I have no clue about what you are saying. Is this a joke.” What It Truly Means: The narcissist claims not to comprehend what you’re expressing to keep away from responsibility. It’s a method for wrecking the discussion and making you question the legitimacy of your interests.
14. Changing the subject
Example: “For what reason would we say we are in any event, discussing this? We should discuss something different.”
When you’re in an argument with a narcissist and they start to use sayings and tactics and even your own words against you. What the narcissist is really doing is shifting the focus of the conversation. This is a tactic the narcissist uses to avoid addressing the issue at hand. It’s a classic distraction technique designed to keep you from holding them accountable Understanding these strategies is the most important phase in safeguarding yourself from a narcissist manipulative game. By learning and remembering these expressions and the meaning behind them, you can begin to recover your sense of power in the relationship. There’s no need to focus on winning against the narcissist; because the narcissist's true goal is always to figure out how to keep control over you and keep you locked in an unhealthy relationship with them. I recall when I wound up in a heated argument with the narcissist, where each word out of my mouth appeared to return to me twofold and with such power, it left me speechless. It was like attempting to get a handle on a ring of smoke — each time I assumed I had an idea about the circumstance, it got away, leaving me more frustrated and hurt. It was only after I found out about these self-centered tactics that the narcissist uses that I came to understand what was really going on. This realization was both a relief and a wake-up call. If you’ve ever felt like you’re losing your grip on reality in an argument, know that you’re not alone, and it’s not your fault. The ramifications of the narcissist’s manipulative tactics stretch out a long way past the quick contention. Over the long run, they can destroy your confidence, twist how you feel and perceive the real world, and leave everlasting and profound scars. It’s critical to perceive the examples stated above and comprehend that these ways of behaving are not about you —they're about the narcissist and their desire for control, over your life. The more you are aware, the more mindful you become, and the better prepared you’ll be to safeguard yourself and, at last, break from the pattern of abuse. Recognizing the things an egomaniac narcissist will say is an integral asset in recovering your life. These expressions aren’t simply words —they're weapons in a mental fight for control. However, with information comes power, and by understanding these tactics, you can begin to destroy the manipulative web the narcissist circles around you, when your life is inhabited by narcissists.