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Thursday, June 6, 2024

Dealing with a Narcissistic Boss? Here's What to Do!

If you find yourself working under a boss who seems overly self-absorbed and difficult to handle, it's important to handle the situation carefully. First off, before you consider leaving, make sure you have a new job lined up. Now, let's explore how to manage the dynamics that come with a narcissistic boss.

Understanding the Dynamics: Working with a narcissistic boss often leads to increased stress for everyone involved. This is partly because of the connection between narcissism and aggressive behavior.

Identifying a Narcissistic Boss: Here are signs that your boss might be a narcissist:

• They disregard personal boundaries.

• They use a "divide and conquer" strategy.

• Their mood can be unpredictable.

• They talk big but don't follow through with actions.

• They take credit for others' work.

• They avoid taking responsibility for mistakes.

• They avoid discussing any negative aspects of the company or role.

• They dodge questions about their management approach.

• They seem distracted and disinterested during conversations.

• They make inappropriate comments about coworkers.

• You've heard negative feedback from others who worked with them.

• They make demeaning remarks about colleagues.

• They make unrealistic promises.

Impact on the Workplace: Narcissism in the workplace is a serious problem that can harm the entire organization. Narcissistic individuals tend to engage in counterproductive behavior, especially when their self-esteem is threatened. Studies have shown a link between narcissism and workplace bullying tactics, as well as sexual harassment.

Coping Strategies: If you're not ready to leave your job, here are some ways to cope with a narcissistic boss:

1. Value Yourself: Remember your skills and qualifications that got you the job in the first place.

2. Offer Compliments: Narcissists respond well to flattery, which can help maintain a better relationship.

3. Document Your Work: Keep a record of your accomplishments to protect your reputation.

4. Network Independently: Establish connections with other leaders in the company discreetly.

5. Seek Support: Talk to trusted friends or family to counter the negative influence.

6. Reflect: Don't internalize negative comments; reflect on your own perspective.

7. Remember Their Vulnerabilities: Understand that your boss may have deep insecurities.

8. Expand Your Experience: Work with other leaders to diversify your references and experiences.

9. Strategize: Position yourself as an ally when your boss seeks validation.

10. Seek Expert Advice: Consult an expert in labor law to understand your rights.

11. Understand the Source: Recognize the roots of your boss's behavior.

12. Respond, Don't React: Stay composed when faced with their behavior.

13. Set Boundaries: Clearly define what is acceptable behavior.

14. Stay Calm: Don't let their actions upset you.

15. Don't Engage: Avoid giving them attention for negative behavior.

16. Be Selective: Choose who deserves your attention and focus.

17. Fact Check: Verify information before reacting.

18. Avoid Arguments: Arguments rarely lead to positive outcomes.

19. Talk to HR: If necessary, involve Human Resources.

20. Understand Toxicity: Learn why some people are toxic or narcissistic.

In conclusion, dealing with a narcissistic boss can be challenging, but there are ways to manage the situation without immediately leaving your job. It's crucial to maintain your self-worth, set boundaries, and seek support from trusted individuals. Remember that your boss's behavior stems from their vulnerabilities, and understanding this can help you navigate the situation more effectively.

*I wrote this article on my Newsbreak Platform in September 2023*

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